WTF

So somebody stole my washing last night. I put the machine on, the cycle is about 36 minutes, I went and watched a show on tv, for about 45 minutes. The machine is about 10 metres from my back door. I actually think it was somebody in the units. The chances that somebody off the street, just by chance, passes by in that time, on that night, in the dark, and finds my washing. Well there are a little too many coincidences there for this little black duck.

Why would anyone steal laundry? I'm 2m tall, 115kgs, my clothes won't fit. They are my work shirts, Black and White Cabs, not exactly the coolest atire for hitting the town. And my favourite Ramones shirt. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I just wish I could have caught them. I can imagine the anger as it rises over the surprise, the shock. I can feel the rush as fight or flight engages into overdrive. I can feel the impact, the snapping as I smash his face into the concrete wash tubs. I can feel the surge as he fights back, the anger I feel that he has the gaul to attack me. The rage that he wants to steal from me. I see him as I smash his face into the wall, again and again and again. The impact a fist makes as it pounds into a human skull. It's a dense thing this head we carry around. But when you hit it, it wobbles around on the neck. The rush from body, the panting from the effort, the rage that doesn't subside. I can feel the bruises from his punches, ineffective as they would be. The abrasions on my face, maybe a sore ear from a stray punch. I can imagine sitting in my unit afterwards, the glum satisfaction of a job well done.

I have grown out of fighting. Almost all of them just aren't worth it. The ripped shirts, the problems with cops, and that look of disappointment and fear on your girlfriends face. That stings more than any punch I've taken. But my Miss Wonderful wasn't here last night, I could have had my fun. I will think about this for a while. Well until I see her again. Despite the rage that burns inside me, I know, just the sight of her, just the idea that she would be here soon. Just to feel her, my arms wrapped around her, her hair tousled in my face, her eyes twinkling to see me. I'd still have like to have caught him, but I will always choose that pretty lass over my beast any day.